Loyalties

            Three o’clock on a Friday afternoon was about the best time you could pick to sneak unnoticed out of a midrise apartment building in a working-class suburb. Pretty near perfect, in fact. The factory labourers would be punching out of the afternoon shift, and waiting for the sluggish buses that would haul their well-flogged carcasses home. The final bell of the nearby public schools had another thirty minutes before they rang out in unison, while the housewives and grandparents who collected their own children would have set out so that they’d be there waiting on time. The derelict elements of the population – sadly numerous in such buildings – would be sleeping off the effects of last night’s booze, meth, or prescription meds. Any repairmen or TV and cable people called out to install or fix something would have either come earlier in the morning or else would be arriving later on in the evening when their clients were home. On top of all that, the daytime has a symphony of background sounds, from the subtle and normally unperceived to the migraine-inducing: cars and trucks on the busy arterial roads that surrounded the neighbourhood; subway and LRT trains clattering and screeching on the tracks which run down a cut in the parklands behind the row of slummy apartments.

            If you followed what might seem like common sense and tried to slink out of your apartment at three o’clock in the morning, on the other hand, you would find that at least a couple of your neighbours took note of the fact and had proceeded to make inferences as to what you were up to at such an hour, when all reputable businesses in the area except the gas station and the 24-hour Shoppers’ Drug Mart have locked their doors. The boldest of them – most likely elderly or an immigrant to the City – may even quiz you about things, or at least hide a snicker-provoking insinuation in their greetings the next time you pass each other in the stairwell. Not that they are unaware that you might have been stepping out to grab a phone card, or some medicine to deal with the flu. But I would suggest that those would be seen as less probable explanations than that you were out to obtain medicine not sold by any national chain (not without a physician’s approval, anyway) or for some forbidden liaison, amorous or mercenary. This and much else Varun Seepersaud had learned in two years of dwelling in just such a ‘slumpartment,’ one of countless cookie-cutter examples crowding in a belt around the outer fringes of the 416.           Varun had been born and raised in the kinder, cleaner suburbs of Mississauga, beyond the last stops on the subway line which mark the effective limits of car-less settlement. There, an extended clan of Seepersauds had been established since sometime in the reign of the first Trudeau, the philosopher king-prime minister who threw open the country’s doors to immigrants from ‘non-traditional source countries,’ thereby initiating the use of spices for cooking and the introduction of the mango to grocery stores. The family pattern had been the one that was then almost a guaranteed rule for immigrants: patient, steady labour and the gradual, accumulative acquisition of durable consumer goods, cars, a house and other aspects of bourgeois security which sound awful in post-modernist academic papers, but which seem pretty darn sweet to the children or grandchildren of indentured cane-cutters. Not that Varun Seepersaud did much reflecting on history. He hadn’t left the comfort of an owned solid brick two-storey in a low-crime area out of a desire to pursue some dream of becoming a consumerist facsimile of a tortured fin-de-siècle artist. That might have been the guiding ideal of most of his circle of friends and roommates (often two very different categories), but it was not what motivated him to live downtown, for the several years that he managed it. He’d actually studied poli-sci and business, which wasn’t the most impractical choice he could have made…though to be perfectly honest with himself, he knew by third year that he was just filling time.

            After he’d graduated, he relented and moved to where the living was cheaper. It wasn’t too much of a loss, when he really considered it. Everyone had drifted off into their own weird subcultures or private miseries after graduation, anyhow. Everyone fighting their own battles…times were tough. Last month, he’d sold the used Acura CSX his parents had bought him in undergrad. Sure, it was good on gas and never had any breakdowns, but saving gas and new fan belts or brake shoes doesn’t count for much when your insurance is eight grand a year and you make less than thirty, with rent taking half. Financial questions had been in Varun’s head every waking hour the last few months. He hadn’t mentioned to his parents that he sold the car they’d bought for him as a gift. The last time he visited, in fact, for a family BBQ on the Canada Day long weekend, he’d told everyone he’d parked down some side street he couldn’t remember the name of…it took a couple hours and changes of spotty holiday bus routes to reach back, though face was saved…till the next long weekend.

            Breanne certainly knew. He hadn’t heard a word from her since she’d had to bum a ride to Club Menage two weekends ago. Their schedules didn’t allow for him to ‘pick her up,’ given how long it would take to TTC it across town to reach her before then heading downtown together…and could you even call that ‘picking someone up’? He’d offered to escort her home to make up for things, but it was almost one and the subway stops before two, so each had to rush back their own separate ways, he to the east, she to the west. He was chivalrous enough to text and ask if she’d got home alright. By four a.m., she hadn’t answered, so he texted one of her girlfriends. She let him stew till the afternoon. Yes, they got him safe and sound, was the reply – but it was slyly hinted things had not been pretty. Given that the TTC must know who are the main users of its services on weekend nights, Varun inwardly lamented, why are there only washrooms at the ends of the line?

            Work at his Uncle Mohan’s used car dealership kept him busy a few hours a week, Best Buy a few more, but the first was just family pity and the second was unsteady. Life was week-to-week now; confusing struggle to get back in the groove, if that was even possible. Observing the crushing social isolation of a lot of his peers in uni, he was glad that he and remained tight with Sean, Kamal, and the rest of the gang he’d grown up and gone to elementary and high school with. Otherwise he’d probably still be killing himself to pay for residence, bars, board game cafes and other largely ineffective means of warding off loneliness. They’d help each other out, too, sometimes – real buddies, not just people who got drunk together…though, unfortunately, Varun always found himself on the receiving, not the giving, end these days. In fact, he was heading out right now to see Sean about some little…job, or trade, call it what you want. Sean was good for those things, and he needed to get back a car, any car, if he wanted to keep Breanne – not that she’d ever crass enough to admit it. Two grand, cash in the pocket – more if things went his way. That was more than what he would make in a month schlepping for Uncle Mohan or the folks at Best Buy. Real buddies, cheesy coming-of-age gangster movie style, yes sir. And then there was Paco, who made sure he got sunlight and exercise…was practically his ‘agent’ for meeting chicks – not that he intended to stray from Breanne, of course. Paco was also a dog. Most people thought of him as a ‘pit bull’ but he was an American bully, if you wanted to be precise. Varun remembered, when he first got Paco, about 18 months ago, and he showed up at one of the regular backyard BBQs as Uncle Mohan’s house in Mississauga – the whole clan pretty much lived on the same street. The reaction of people – the ladies, especially – was like, “oh my God, he’s so scary!’ but also, ‘protect me!’ and…they didn’t say this out loud, but he could read it in their body language…’oooh, it must take a beast to control an animal like that!’ Heheh….Roweena had picked the name. Roweena Persadie, dark and skinny and smart and silly. They’d gone all the way from kindergarten through grade 12 together, though now he only saw her at those backyard parties or if  a mutual friend invited both of them to the same event. His dad and her dad were best friends back in the old country, as retold in endless rum-soaked stories he never paid much attention to. He supposed her logic had run something like, ‘he’s a pit bull, and Pitbull is Hispanic, so the dog has to have a Spanish name.’ It seemed a little stupid, but Roweena was cute.

            First he would go see Sean in the west end, then on to Mississauga in the evening – no mean feat on public transit. It was hard to keep a clear head…Did you ever notice how loud a dog’s toenails and panting sound in apartment lobbies? Right as Varun laid hold of the vestibule door – “Hey, Paco! And Varun!” The voice came from the open door of the superintendent’s office. Dammit! She should have been out checking the other properties she managed – since she lived in Varun’s building, its affairs usually got taken care of before noon. Stifling a groan, Varun hailed her back, “Heyyy….!” He preferred not to call her by anything, since to refer to someone who lives in your building and sees you practically every day by their job title would be snobbish, while ‘Mrs. Mavrokordatos’ was unpronounceable and calling a normal, modern day person ‘Athena’ just seemed weird. What was the short form of that? Could you even make one?

            “Gosh, somebody’s getting to be a big boy!” Mrs. Athena Mavrokordatos cooed as she rushed out to pet the lapping, tail-wagging pooch.

            Ugh! Every time…then again, Varun remembered, he had been turned away from enough places where the landlord didn’t want the liability of a ‘banned breed’ (yeah, banned in Québec!) in their building. Mrs. Mavrokordatos, on the other hand, was crazy over Paco: “It’s not the dogs, it’s the owners they oughtta ban!” Of course, a woman who had a pack of breeding Scotch terriers in her employer-supplied housing unit could hardly complain about a bachelor with a single dog.

            “Oh my goodness, if you guys were in – “she always addressed them as if Varun and Paco were equally her tenants – “I’d have got the guy to come in n’ take a look at the pipes – he was in, y’know, patching up the walls in 407; they say nothing’s come in since Sunday but I want the guy to have a look just in case. Don’t wanna have to do it all over again if there’s still a leak in your unit.”

            “Oh, ehhh…” Varun wanted to think of some excuse, but the super was just pretend-annoyed and he was too tired to come up with anything.

            “Now I gotta do another water shut off…who’s a gooh-boy! Who’s a gooh-dog!”

            “I uh, I forgot. Slept in, sorry. Late night,” Varun mumbled, pulling the leash to urge the dog through the vestibule doors but trying to be gentle enough that the dog-loving super would not think badly of him. “Yeah right,” he thought but did not say. “Another leak? More like to check if I am packing up to move out before rent day.” Varun had been over a week late three of the last four months.

            It was a hot summer afternoon, which meant Kennedy Station was humid as the rainforest exhibit at the Science Centre. On the plus side, while the trains belched out their cargo of half-dead workers and students, they’d be practically empty when they shot back westbound. After the smelly human tide had washed past him, Varun entered the car, only to dart out, yanking Paco behind him; “nope, nope, nope!” That car had no AC…near fatal torture, that. He slid into the next one down just as the chimes dinged. Cold and nearly vacant. While the WiFi signal lasted, he alternated between perusing a police foundations textbook that his buddy Joe had given him after the latter made it into the York region PD and the demands of social media. He suspected Joe wanted company on the job. Moreover, he was one of those guys who thinks what works for him must be right for everyone else. Varun had to admit that all that police overtime looked like a fortune next to the grudging sub-minimum payouts Uncle Mohan was giving him. ‘Immigrant family solidarity’ is often a euphemism for cheap labour. Then again, Joe was a beefy 6’3” and one of those Boy Scout types who always plays the good guy and somehow manages not to f**k up their chances at everything. The background checks they did for the police were like something out of 1984. And that was before you even got accepted into training. But, then, what else was he going to do? Law school? Med school? Yeah right, mom and dad.

            The train progressed swiftly and smoothly from green and sunny suburbs, past the scuzzy slum-in-a-drum towers by Vic Park, then underground into the heart of the City. At Bloor-Yonge, the train immediately filled up, as it was now moving outwards vis-à-vis the heart of the City. Varun hated the foetid press of bodies, with the inherent threat of pickpocketing, molesty touching, and, above all, the germs on people – the ‘great unwashed- is not an empty figure of speech. Varun was broad-minded enough to know you couldn’t exactly blame people for travelling in the only way possible for them, but, still….a friend of his got partial kidney failure after contracting gastroenteritis like four or five times in two years, probably spread by homeless people – it was epidemic in Toronto shelters – touching subway poles and stuff. This afternoon, though, Varun didn’t have to worry. Paco was lolling at his feet, tongue-hanging smile on his face. He wouldn’t have known where they were headed, as Varun had always taken the Acura when going out to visit his family. The passengers pouring into the subway car were not so relaxed. In the analysis for seating and standing positions which every seasoned straphanger performs upon entering a car, a ‘vicious dog’ sitting opposite the entrance raised red flags, making them hustle as far down as they could. Those compelled by the press of flesh to be nearest Varun and Paco twisted in their seats, tucked in their extremities and wore fearful discomfort on their faces, “well, I never!” Paco did not notice and Varun pretended not to notice – though he was secretly enjoying himself.

            Varun was not entirely at ease, though. The signal was dead on his phone. Wind Mobile! Sean was supposed to call him…though with all the people around, he would have to be cautious how he responded. If there was business to discuss, no matter whether it was sketch stuff or merely buying some car or computer parts (though now that Varun thought about this…) it was phone calls, a meeting in some ethnic restaurant where no one could overhear them, or else a walk through some innocuous suburb. Sean probably knew the seasons of every flower and tree better than any professor of urban forestry, even if the only Latin he knew was the mottos tattooed on his skin.

            Out of the station, Varun stood in the snaking line at one of the bus stops by the station gates. He didn’t have far to go. Still, he didn’t like the sight of the inky mauve clouds boiling up from off the Lake. He wasn’t carrying an umbrella. Moreover, he was feeling low in the world and didn’t want to show up at Uncle Mohan’s looking like a drowned rat. Nowadays, people driving eight-year-old Civics seemed to his eyes like smug, privileged, planet-ravaging jerks.

            The bus rolled up right as the first peals of thunder echoed down the concrete canyons. As Varun stepped onto the platform and gave Paco a tug, a smoke-coarsened, nasal female voice whined, “Heyyy, you’re naaht gonna let him on heah, are you? He’s got a dawwwg!” A shabby, witch-faced woman with permed, obviously dyed ‘red’ hairm who probably played a lot of Bingo, scowled venomously at him. The driver stared at Varun and Paco. The driver’s natural inclination – Varun gave him the benefit of the doubt – would have been to do nothing, but Ms. Frizz – Varun had troubled picturing a Mr. for her – shuffled up past the yellow line, blocking Varun from paying his fare. “You can’t let him on,” she droned; “he’s got a dawwwg!” he driver waited glumly for the problem to resolve itself.

            Behind him, Varun heard grumbling. Lest the crowd take Ms. Frizz’ side, he tried to state his case: “He’s my pet; he doesn’t bite” – people love dogs, don’t they? – “And I was just on the subway like two minutes ago; nobody had a problem.”

            Ms. Frizz was not placated. “He’s got a dawwwg. It’s rush ‘owah. You can’t bring a dawwwg on the bus at rush ‘owah. Read the siiign.” She gestured to the metal plaque deeper into the bus and presently invisible to all parties concerned, which spells out a bunch of draconian rules which are basically never enforced, unless drivers want to be pricks. Varun knew that the sign did say something about how, during ‘rush hours,’ drivers could, at their discretion, choose to exclude people with pets. But, come on, who followed those things?

            Unfortunately for him, while there might have been one or two people won over by Paco’s cuteness – plus his risqué identity – the bulk of the commuters were interested solely in getting home as quickly as possible and therefore, as such crowds always do, instinctively turned against the party who appeared most bullyable and likely to yield – definitely not the scruffy, prune-like old woman with all the time in the world to wait (retired? Welfare? Varun decided on the most unfavourable reading: that she’d reached retirement age after a life on welfare). Varun was not by nature quarrelsome. He backed down and retreated, leaving Frizz to pucker in triumph as the bus sped away.

            There was no choice but to carry on by foot. Alas, Varun did not know the area and Sean, being Sean, had never texted or email Varun the address. As he hurried along the sidewalk, keeping to the main road, he whipped out his phone. A solitary drop of rain struck his thumb. “Awww, shit!” Varun muttered. While the signal had been dead in the tunnel, Breanne had missed-called him. Twice. That wasn’t like her at all. A few more rain drops pattered down the screen. Paco whimpered – he wasn’t any fonder of foul weather than his owner. “Damn it, come on!” Varun raged at the device as he fumbled with it, the touch screen refusing to obey his will as the water-slick surface blurred the signal from his fingertips. As his finger swiped about the screen like a drunken ice skater, the desktop menu flashed into the ‘incoming call’ display. Frustration slowing his reactions, he accidentally swiped the green. “Noooh!” he groaned. It was Roweena, all sweet-voiced, asking him some perfunctory small talk stuff, which he perfunctorily answers so as to avoid seeming rude. He could hear lots of noise in the background; she must already be at Uncle’s. Indeed, she announced that was the case and that everyone was waiting for him to arrive – ‘everyone,’ of course meaning her. She then asked how the job hunting was going, trying to be as non-demeaning as one can be asking such a question. She received evasive mumbling in reply, exactly as she expected. Fighting to contain her excitement, she told Varun that there was this rich old guy whose cat she’d helped save after the kitty had been bitten by a raccoon – Roweena was a veterinary assistant at a clinic by Church and Wellesley. He was so grateful to Roweena…well, so, on her own initiative, she’d pressed him with a hard luck story about this friend of hers stuck grinding away in retail (she’d actually said her “boyfriend” but she did not tell this to Varun), even though he was full of talent and had a BA in some vaguely useful subject from Ryerson University. There was wisdom in her whinging, for it was known in the clinic that the owner of Sheherezade – the cat she helped save – was a middle-ranking official in some bloated, well-funded government department. This gentleman, cheeks still damp with tears of joy as he embraced his beloved pedigree Laurentian Shorthair, was only too eager to agree to put in a good word for a promising candidate who would also help meet diversity quotas. In other words, she’d got Varun a job. True, the starting wage was only $16 an hour, barely a living wage according to the newspapers. On the other hand, it was a secure job behind a desk; a mythical prize in the current economy. She added that, as a vet’s assistant, she made about the same…

            Why would she mention that? Varun asked himself. He muttered that he was busy at the moment, which was enough for Roweena, who wished him speedily on his way. Varun wouldn’t have gone into the details, anyhow. Roweena taken care of, he called Breanne back. He kept walking, phone against his ear, waiting. He didn’t know what those two missed calls were for, but he was sure, at least, that she was mad. It rang out. He called again. And again. Same result. Okay, real mad, then. He sighed and decided this time to leave a voice mail…hmm…voice mail inbox full. Breanne was not a very organized girl, but it did seem a little too convenient to be a coincidence. He could handle it tonight, he guessed, if he got home early – and if that didn’t look possible, he could find some moment to slink away from the party that evening and sort things out there.

             He was keen to put his phone away because the storm was picking up and he wasn’t entirely sure which way he was supposed to be going. The sky over the City was now one vast milky umbrella, foretelling a long and steady rain. It also made navigation difficult, as he couldn’t discern direction using the now-hidden sun. The neighbourhood was not an old one, by Toronto standards. There were none of the richly carved Gothic Revival homes and repurposed turn-of-the-last-century garment factories that beautify the south and east, nor were there many of the lot-spanning glass-and-steel prisms which embody Fritz Lang’s dystopian vision in the latter day 6ix. The area was, instead, divided by numerous irregular side streets lined with modest brick-and-cladding houses, small but with generous yards, in the cosy but generic architecture of postwar suburbia. Towering birches, blue spruce and bushy Norway and silver maples, lush with the rainy summer, told of the practical policies of City governments past, before localist ideology dictated that fragile red oaks and sugar maples be planted in asphalt fertilized with road salt. Every couple of blocks, a squadron of Brutalist apartment towers glowered among themselves in silent counsel; their origin story was rooted in well-meant, grossly ineffectual social engineering designed to uplift the habitually indigent, threatening poor by planting them in close proximity to the more industrious and ambitious members of their class. The sidewalks were uncannily bare of pedestrians, except for the odd shambling form bundled in a shapeless coat, bowed and hooded against the spitting rain. In the covered entryways of the sombre towers, groups of three to five youths could be glimpsed, furtive and hostile, watching the street. Passing a windowless corner wall, Varun observed that some community organization probably led by naïve students who lived far away, had put up a mural in bold, plastic colours. There was a Captain Planet-esque globe in bright green and blue, a stylized bus and towers, black-and-white portraits of Gandhi, MLK and Mother Teresa (copied off famous press photos of each, which appeared disjointed when put together). Among this ill-proportioned scenery, a suitably multicultural gang of youths cavorted together with no apparent object. The figures were garbed and coloured like a cartoon from the early 90s, with backpacks and shoes, watches etc. that gave the impression of roller blade gear, sans rollers. Above all, drawn to a different scale, the upper torso and head of a hijab’d exaggeratedly Somali-looking young woman floated, her arms folded eyes burning with all the baleful hatred of a coddled grad student. Varun shuddered, knowing this was not a good place to be lost in.

            What was it Sean said? Left at the Coffee time in front of the dental clinic, left again, like you’re going in a spiral…Which Coffee Time? There’s gotta be more than one in the area…he rung Sean’s phone; no answer. “Maaan….for real?” On the bright side, he could see the next intersection up ahead: a glassy new mixed-use midrise complex, a gas station and a strip mall…if anything, there’s be a Shoppers’ or somewhere he could buy an umbrella and a donut-n’-coffee place he could grab a bite and wait out the rain. The beneficent owners of the business strip had installed glass awnings anchored on cathedral-style flying buttresses for a hundred and fifty feet or more. Varun sheltered against the wall beside a huge potted shrub and brushed out the water which had slimed his hair gel. He looked at this phone. A text from Breanne: “dnt act like u dnt understand.” Understand what? He was aware it was something about their recent difficulties, but was this, say, bait for him to apologize or offer to make amends or was she, God forbid, telling him things were done? The wind blew unseasonably cold, as if in concert with his predicament. He reluctantly pulled back his jacket cuss and tapped out the least-potentially-disastrous message he could come up with at the moment, chilly, wet and agitated as he was. “Yes I kno. I’m sorry babe. Nything I can make it up…”

             As he was about to send the message he heard a voice growl something about “the fruits.” It sounded queer and distant under the patter of the rain on the glass canopy and the crunching roll of cars passing in and out of the strip mall parking lot. He noticed it above other distance voices in the lot and from shop entryways only because of the language. “Fruits.” Who says fruits, with an ‘s,’ in any normal conversation? Varun pondered, distracted for a moment from his task. His question was answered a split second thereafter, in a most unexpected and terrifying way, when a wildly bearded and haggard face loomed up, shadowing his phone, which he dropped in fright. “Hmm? So you gonna give ‘em back ta me then?” the glassy-eyed, abominably filthy patriarch standing in front of him asked.

            Varun, true to his Canadian upbringing, responded to being terrorized by the socioeconomically pathetic with obsequious politeness. “I’m, ah, sorry, uh, sir, give what back? I don’t know what you mean…”

            “Is’sat it, mmh? What’s that then, I’m no better n’ some rat ‘er dog ya find on the streets, huh? It’s mine, mine by rights, so sayeth…mmhm..” the gravelly, mucous-clotted voice cracked and sputtered as Varun backed against the wall, unable to escape the streetside prophet’s hypnotic stare. “The fruits ta’ he who sows the seed!” the stranger wailed, with particular emphasis on ‘seed.’ “N’ I sowed the seed, I did, in twice five miles of fertile ground, n’ the golden sun was whirlin’ round!” the old man came close to Varun’s face, whispering almost conspiratorially.

             Varun cringingly attempted to reason like a guilt-ridden prisoner: “I can help, listen, if you need something – “his nervous eyes caught the LCBO logo on the plaza sigh a few metres to his left. “I’ll, uh, get it for you, don’t worry.” Far from being placated, the old man seized him with a nut-brown hand, the shiny, sun-scorched surface of which resembled an exoskeleton which scraped and scratched, rather than touched, the tender skin on the younger man’s collar bone and throat. Varun bruised his shoulders falling back into the wall. He writhed left and right, but despite thrice weekly gym sessions, he was powerless to shake the malodorous wraith who clung tenaciously to him as the sucker-legs of a gypsy moth caterpillar cling to the hair and clothes of an unlucky passer-by on whom they dropped from their tree.

            “Ah…ah-haah!” Varun tried to stifle his cries. Everyone was hiding from the rain; there was no point embarrassing himself.  His assailant, meanwhile, was jabbering in a mixture of King James Bible and lower class Canuck slang. Apparently he mistook Varun for someone who’d stolen or done some other wrong against him. The man’s immediate object seemed to be to poke and dig at Varun’s eyes and mouth with his scabrous claws. Varun attempted to resist, but even though he outweighed his adversary by a good forty pounds, fear, confusion and, above all, cringing disgust rendered him dazed and feeble, like trying to run in a dream. Just as the man’s sodden beard scratched across the chest of Varun’s jacket, his eyes bugged out like a pair of pickled lychees. “Naawaahooh!” he let out the most ghastly primal wail that Varun had ever heard from a two-legged being. Varun’s attacker spun round, flailing his arms in vain grabs for support. Varun, too stunned himself to react, stood back and observed – Paco had seized the hobo about his femur, his jaws clamped like a vice. He did not bark, only let out a seething frothy growl. The man swung and grunted, trying to steady himself to kick the dog with his free, boot-clad foot, but the stout beast, solid as an 85-pound ham, its veins coursing with adrenaline, was far beyond his powers to contend with. When the man tried to bed down to strike the dog with his fists, the dog wrenched the leg it held away off the ground, sending the hobo toppling into the pavement. Now, the old alchy was crying like a whipped puppy, transformed into the picture of sorry helplessness. “D-don’t hurt me, mister, I didn’t mean no nothing’ by it. Oh gosh, oh gosh, I’m sorry, mister, please don’t let him hurt me no more.” Varun, true to his nature, immediately felt sad for the fellow. Life on the street all those years couldn’t have been easy…

            “Calm down, Paco, easy boy, it’s okay now,” Varoon soothed as he picked up his phone and Paco’s leash. He was about to offer the battered hobo help to stand when Paco charged up, snapping at the prostrate man’s throat, causing him to scream in panic. Varun glanced at the man’s hand…he was gripping a glass bottle that had presumably been lying beside the nearby recycling bin. Wretched as his life was, the prospect of having his jugular munched out by an angry pit bull did not seem worth it and he relinquished the bottle. As Varun and Paco left, they could hear the old hobo howling curses addressed to them, passing drivers and whatever old companions he might have seen in his inebriated visions. “Cowards! Tryin’ ta beat up an old man. He sicked his dog on me, didn’t ya see? F***kin’ tryin’ ta kill a defenceless old man. Yer a f***kin’ goof, ya know that?”…

            Varun slopped into the Coffee Time, whose weather-stripped double doors silenced the greybeard loon. He ordered a large of the chain’s nearest facsimile of the Double-Double and sat down at a table looking out on the intersection. He set his phone on the table but wanted to warm up and steady his nerves a bit before calling Sean again. No missed calls or new messages – good, if only because it meant less to think about. The rain was coming down in sheets now and lightning flickered off in the distance. A proper summer thunderstorm was brewing. There would be downed power lines and birds’ nests on the sidewalks tomorrow morning. Maybe even a foolhardy swimmer taken in by the undertow along the lakeshore. If someone had been following Varun all afternoon, they might be forgiven for thinking he seemed even more stressed and uneasy than when he set out on his journey. He paid no attention to Paco, who, this being a working class neighbourhood, didn’t attract the nervous attention he might have at a café downtown. He just stared out the window, contemplating the people in their cars, the ruffled, quivering maples trees and the birds that were probably hunkering among their branches or in hollows – he particularly imagined owls, for some reason – watching the storm as he was. The buzz of his phone vibrating along the table started him out of his meditations. “Hey, Sean!”

            Sean spoke low and excitedly, but said very little, leaving the other party to fill things in. “Yo, what the f***k, mate? Been waitin’ for you…”

            “Yeah, uh, sorry. Listen, I just got attacked by…I’m not kidding…this crazy homeless guy. For real. Just came out of nowhere n’ went all apeshit on me. This is one sketch f***kin’ place you’re living in, bro. On top of that, man, I just don’t know my way around here. Did you even give me the address?”

            Slow, heavy breathing. “…You got ‘em…?”

            “Hmm?…Oh, yeah…yeah. Listen, I’m at the Coffee Time. By the gas station. Remember, I don’t have the car, since last month…”

            “…” Sean mumbled something. His words were unintelligible, but he was plainly displeased. “In the mall with the fish n’ chips place and the Guyanese bakery?”

            “They got a Guyanese bakery in here? I mean, yeah. So, you can, uh, come and pick me up?”

            “…I could have got you some work, you know, but…yeah, yeah.”

            “Okay, I’ll be on the lookout for you.”

            “Driving a green Altima.”

            “Oh? New – “ Sean hung up before Varun could finish.

            Ten minutes later, a dark green Altima with rims and windows tinted to obsidian blackness was idling at the edge of the lot. “You couldn’t park a little closer?” Varun though, annoyed at the prospect of dashing through the rain and curbside pools.

            “In the back,” Sean called out, rolling the driver’s window down when Varun reached. “Christ, you couldn’t walk three blocks? I don’t like having that thing behind me.”

            “But you didn’t give me the add…” Varun gave up before he finished the sentence and it was silence for the rest of the mercifully short ride. Varun couldn’t be sure – after all, it is not easy to keep your bearings riding in a car, in a thunderstorm, in the evening – but Sean appeared to be driving in circles and doubling back on parallel streets. He could barely catch a street sign, what with the water running down the window blurring his view, but he was sure they’d passed certain houses and shops more than once.

            The car crawled down an alleyway long and only a single lane wide, with a high concrete wall on one side and some sort of brown-brick old-fashioned industrial building on the other. The tall grass and springy young saplings growing unkempt at every seam and border of the pavement, and the plethora of weather-greyed cargo pallets and peeling drums lying about suggested it was abandoned or at least neglected by whoever owned it. Down past a bend in the U-shaped lot, in the corner, behind a row of loading bays with filmy windows and padlocked gates, they stopped. “Here,” Sean said curtly as they piled out. He led Varun not into the derelict factory but to a high chain link fence where the factory premises adjoined the backyards of a row of houses, which could barely be seen for the dense weeds and shaggy old trees which spilled over the barrier. “Come on.” Sean had peeled back a door-sized section of chain linking, the edges of which had been clipped by heavy shears. Clever, Varun thought; when the person lets go, it will spring back into place, the cuts hidden among the foliage.

            “Whose place is this?” Varun asked as they walked across the long, uneven lawn towards the back of the house. It was evidently an old building, wide enough to block off the view of the street, mottled brick on both stories with a faded shingle roof and green and white wood trim which looked quaint from afar but which closer inspection revealed to be badly in need of a reno. Sun-bleached Fisher-Price vehicles and deflated basketballs were scattered around about the back porch.

            “I wouldn’t say,” Sean explained, “but it’s okay since he’s not in the country. Some rich Chinese, foreign investor type. They’re not coming into the country for another ninety days and won’t be moving in till probably next year – they’re rebuilding; this one’s gonna get knocked down. Prolly gonna put up one of them ‘monster homes,’ flip it, eh? But that suits us just fine. I know the guy charged with gutting the place…it’s a three-week job, but if he tells ‘em three months, what the hell do they know? Gonna get some use of the place beforehand, y’know? And if anybody goes off ratting to the cops, they’ll be knocking on Mr. Ching Chong’s door in Shanghai or wherever.” Sean burst into menacing laughter.

            “Ha-ha,” Varun attempted to play along, “poor guy won’t know what they’re f***king talking about,” but he sounded so awkward. He was really out of his depth now…

            Sean knocked a rhythm on the sliding door at the rear of the house. They were ushered in by a disreputable-looking tough – a bird of Sean’s flock. The house was empty of the finer touches of domesticity, but the basic structure and surfaces were all intact and there were couches and chairs, either abandoned or brought in after. It was like there was a house party going on. There were people milling about – mostly men, though – bottles and disposable cups of assorted types of booze were all over the place; pungent, but not entirely unwelcome, aromas wafted through the air and a massive sound system pulsed late 90s-early 2000s hip hop and reggaeton through the floorboards. Varun did not inquire what was happening on the upper floors. He did not inquire about anything – indeed, he passed among the bodies and bottles in an almost catatonic state, following Sean past the herculean bouncers, down into the basement.

            “There’s for providing the entertainment,” Sean shoved a wad of bills into Varun’s passively obliging hand. “Er, I should say, half of it. I did you a favour, bet five hundred bucks…on yours, of course. Me, I like to hedge things, put a little on both sides, y’know? Not like I’ve got a dog in the fight,” his teeth gleamed in the dim light. “You can leave or stick around; up to you,” Sean offered, making his way towards a wall of people in the centre of the basement, which had had its wood and drywall-based partitions knocked out. The music was low and indistinct down here, but the crowd was noisier and frantically alert and energetic. Nobody was dancing. “’Course,” Sean shouted over the hubbub, “if you can’t stay, word of honour, you’ll get yer share of the winnings – if you win,” he punched his chest and laughed.

            Varun desired nothing more than to be out of that dungeon; to be at ease among friends and family in gentle, harmless, familiar Mississauga. But he could not tear himself away. He could not resist making his way, zombie-like, into the wall – it was actually a ring – of people. Pushing through till he was pressed against the four-foot-high barrier that edges the circle of bare concrete. A stentorious voice bellowed a ritualized declaration and the circle was empty no more. He knew he would regret what he would see, but he could not turn away. Not when the two squat, muscular dogs, ears pricked, teeth bared, stalked each other around the ring to cheers, jeers and the waving of handfuls of cash. Not when, obeying the instinct bred into them over generations and cultivated by rigorous training, they leapt at each other, determined that only one – if any – would leave. Not when his pet and companion, thrilled by ancestral bloodlust, severed the ear of his russet-coated foe. No, not until the russet-coloured dog, equally matched physically but with keener technique, turned the fight and crippled Paco with bites to his hamstrings, before moving in and disembowelling his weakened opponent. Then and only then did Varun tear his body away – he ran sobbing through the twilight and the freezing downpour – though his mind would not leave. Not that night, or any other night.

            When, heedless of the rain and tree-blasting lightning, Varun entered the subway, he did not go west, to Mississauga, but east, towards downtown. When he sat, alone, at the row of bar-style stools looking onto Yonge Street in the Hero Burger, masticating a wild Alaskan salmon and ciabatta burger like it was so much cud, he did not bother to check the text that Breanne had sent him. She’d grown tired of putting up a pouty front and included a link to an ad for a concert in the beaches they could go to, seeing as he’d be getting a new car on payments when the cheque for his new job came in. Nor did he check the texts from Roweena, with an attached duckface photo, asking where he was and if Paco was handling the GO Train alright. Nor the voicemail when she repeated her enquiries because ‘everybody’ (she) was worried. No; he just stared mindlessly out the window. A hipster student type who’d been one or two behind him in line knelt down on the other side of the floor-to-ceiling windows; knelt on the wet, gum-spoor-dotted sidewalk, no doubt relishing the experience for its gritty authenticity. With a bluff, sanctimonious grin, he handed a burger combo worth a sixth of a min-wage worker’s daily income to a hunched, Aboriginal-looking man squatting cross legged under an umbrella, beside an illegible cardboard sign. He saw the hipster look left and right, swelling with pride at the grandness of his generosity. Above all, he saw the squinting, mouth-breathing wreck of a man take the assemblage of Angus beef and layered toppings firmly in his swollen, black-nailed hands and tear it into two more or less even portions, offering one to the grateful maw of a husky in a Maple Leafs sweater, and smile.

.

Copyright © 2017 by M.G. Warenycia

Leaside Ravine

Down gully clad with grape and strangler vine,

Belted, booted, dark-clad troops in bleaching sun

Grasping weed and branch to scale the cline,

Not far from where the deeds were done,

‘Neath hickory and maple, and cicadas’ brassy whine.

Dusky ramparts shade the sheen

Of the languid, limpid river,

Now snaking silver, now unseen,

Whose murmured tales make hard men shiver.

Aspen-leaves flicker like coins in a pond;

At forest-edge a reporter guileless asks

For what they probe with spade and wand,

Cursing the sin that birthed their tasks,

While rouge-stained twilight, looming low,

Suffuses the swelter with a ruddy glow.

. . .

.

Copyright © 2018 by M.G. Warenycia

After the Storm (Sint Maarten, 2018)

The Boardwalk’s mosaic of pink and grey

Frames a vacant vista, asleep at hot midday;

Bare-sparred boats, like drunkards lay

Bone-white and gleaming upon the azure bay.

.

A pye-dog pants in an almond’s purple lee,

Grateful to meet a live and leaf-crowned tree;

O’er mugs and magnets, cowry beads, tacky tees,

Shopkeeps lean, uneasy, looking out to sea.

.

Fresh-clothed, the houses, in florid hues, raked clean

The alleys, the palm-fronds shooting green;

Fragrant with salt and peace, the landward breeze –

Blows in a Princess or the Sovereign of the Seas?

.

No! On the blue beyond the beachfront pale,

No liner looms, nor heaves a yachtsman’s sail;

Barren, ‘tis, as the dust beneath the acacia’s thorny veil,

And silent as the insects before the fateful gale.

.

An Age of easy gold and neon light,

Blood, drums, and witching eyes a’glow in sweltering night,

Dissolves into memory, as the sand drinks the rain,

Leaving yet a sweet perfume, and a wet and wine-dark stain.

.

The Pelican roosts, the red Flamboyant blooms,

Unsold trinkets gather dust, and the maids sweep empty rooms;

Looted store and raided resort

More than stormwinds scourged the blossom’d port;

Hands that scorned to plant the soil

Stealing the fruits of their brethren’s toil.

.

The brazen spark in the Old Man’s eye –

Would he fume and froth or, smiling, sigh?

The Winds of Change have blasted by,

But that dreaming Island will never die.

. . .

.

Copyright © 2018 by M.G. Warenycia

The Tower

The Tower rises – stern and steely spire –

Rises over the Lake, surveying the frost-bit lands,

Beacon  – aglow with neon fire –

For eager eyes and willing hands,

Led by rude or noble lusts,

Fed by hopes, frail or delirious,

Till, by process both plain and mysterious,

Bones and minds and dreams alike

Are quietly,

Quietly worn to dust.

.

After the night –

Long and dense and brooding night –

A brief and cold and pallid light:

Unforgiving Day;

The beacon fades,

Fades to grey;

Fades,

Fades away.

A Discovery

What’s that at which you’re peering

Amid the trailside clearing?

What’s that in the leaves,

Where the dappled glimmer cleaves

The forest’s noonday night?

.

It’s some garbage; it is nothing;

At least that’s what I’m hoping.

I don’t like how the aspens sway

Or how the flitting shadows play

In the grove’s miasmic light.

.

It’s not ours to save the day;

There’ll be a price to pay;

Drop that stick and quit your poking;

Unhallowed things you’re stoking

And our sleep will bear the blight.

.

Back away, delete the picture;

Come let’s heed the copper’s stricture,

It’s time we’d best be going;

Look – the coydogs come a’loping

And the birds are taking anxious flight.

.

The slope they’ve cordoned off

Where the earth runs damp and soft;

The sky is swiftly darkening,

We’d best be homeward harkening

And pray we don’t dream of the sight.

. . .

.

Copyright © 2017 by M.G. Warenycia

The Tamarack Bog

I met a man in a grease-grimed diner –
A grey, and hunched, and trout-eyed miner –
And offered a bottle if he’d regale
Stone-bored travellers with some age-steeped local tale.
An evil thirst impelled to slake,
He grinned, and twitched, and whisp’ring spake:
“Far from the City’s neon glare,
Where rise the peaks, ‘neath whose icy stare
Sourdough and coolie panned for gold,
A lake reposes, still and cold.
No mapbook marks its oozing shore,
Known but to time-dimmed Native lore;
An unclaimed stake of prairie loam,
Where the aspens quake in the breezeless gloam
At the edge of a low and level plain
Whose soil yields not fruit nor grain.
Truckers who pass the vap’rous glade
Tell of shadows that dance in black spruce’ shade;
No bird alights; no fawn does drink
From that stygian well of living ink.
The scaly birch and gall-skinned oak,
Ne’er shaking off last winter’s cloak,
Brood o’er banks, whose gummy clay and feathered reeds
Conspire to secret unhallowed deeds.
There, lone and shunned, its piles half sank
‘Mid the vines and mud, so queerly rank,
A cottage stands, whose windows leer,
Unblinking, at the lurid meer.
Hurry home, ere the red sun’s sunk and gone
And the moon ‘pon that glassy water shone,
Lest in those windows you glimpse a glow
That no fire, nor moon, nor lamp could throw.
If yet you should tarry, and gaze within the bog,
One look will see you vanish, wailing through the fog.”

. . .

.

Copyright © 2017 by M.G. Warenycia

Death on a Flower

High in a sky as faience blue
An orb like molten copper glows
Whose fire long chased the morning dew
Off milkweed, thistle, meadow rose;
Cardinal’s call, cicada’s whine
From berry bush and wild-grape vine
Echoes off pine-crowned roadside hill
Where currants ripe, baskets to fill;
Beyond the wood, the Lake beach reeks
Of hot dogs, beer and firework smoke;
The muskrats toil in sun-warmed creeks,
And dragonfly and Mourning Cloak
Dance and whirl, while the barred owl seeks
Soft repose in his hollowed oak
And tree-worms rest in elm-wood bower
Through blist’ring, buzzing mid-noon hour.
A busy bee – no rest for she –
Alights upon a gilt-plumed reed,
The goldenrod which bounds the lea,
So that her kin might thereof feed;
Spies she not that velvety bead?
Yellow, splashed pink, and tense with need –
The eyes, all eight, which gleam with greed?
No shadowed trap, nor silken snare –
‘Tis Beauty forms a murd’rer’s lair.
Lightning claws pounce from living bloom;
A poisoned bite thus seals her doom
While breeze-gusts in the verge-scrub play
Furtive whispers; a Summer’s day.

. . .

.

Copyright © 2018 by M.G. Warenycia

Chaco

by M.G. Warenycia

            The straw-blonde blades of the elephantine grass drew invisible lines across Tuco’s shins and calves, only coming to his attention when a bead of sweat found them. The tall grass and the desiccated quebracho trees that huddled in clumps across the savannah hid him from the aim of the Bolivian’s Mausers, but not from the heat and the thirst that was killing him as surely as any bullet. Tuco was not the type to despair easily, though, just as he was not one for dramatic displays of joy or pride – though there were exceptions. It was perhaps a fundamental trait of his people, this passivity that endured without complaint, suffered without self-pity. To a different fragment of his heritage – forgotten to living memory – he owed another side of his character, latent, but as irrepressible once erupted…just like the faint bluish muzzle that remained no matter how closely he shaved. It was fortunate he grew up in a countryside not unlike this harsh subtropical zone, except in being marred by the hand of plough-driving man. He observed the dense lines of acacia and wild olive, grey and green amid the yellow sea, which he knew meant a shallow creek, which ran with life-giving water and which – almost as important – curled around the thicket into which the recoiling enemy had fallen back. He trod onward, hunched and stealthy, the red dust mixing paint with his sweat, contemplating succour in water and blood…

            When the Colonel pinned the badge of brilliant cloth and noble bronze upon his chest, he had given a piece of paper to Tuco that, the Captain told him, explained that his country was grateful and proud for his fearless defiance of the risk of death, leading the charge when the platoon leader was down and the battle depended on coming to grips with the enemy and driving them from their emplacements. It was true, as well, that the men of the regiment credited Tuco with this quality, so vaunted by the nation that she now fed with bread and beef, and shod with leather, her very same children who, mere months earlier, she was content to witness toiling under the meridional sun with bared backs, sand flies and chiggers gnashing their naked and stone-scuffed feet. But the officers who mentioned Tuco in despatches and the comrades who slapped his muscled back did not understand what lay beneath the surface of that visage, impassive and unchanging as Machu Picchu’s stones. They thought that Tuco was unmoved by the risk of death. In fact, he was driven by hunger for a victory that could never be found on the battlefield alone. The hunger that impelled him was as savage and monomaniac as that which drove men from hardscrabble villages in Galicia and Extremadura to throw down their last doubloon for a rapier or arquebus and passage across the unfathomed ocean to lands more idea than place, trying their hand in a game whose stakes were conquest or death. The treasures that Juan de Solis and Jeronimo Cabrera sought were yellow and glittered; those which Tuco craved were black and liquid, and red and pulsing…

            Tuco had lived in the district of San Ignacio all his life. In fact, the entirety of his experience, from birth to adulthood, had occurred within a day’s ride from the Estancia Narvaez, on which his father worked until drinking himself to death somewhere in his forties. For boys born as he was, there was never a moment of choosing a job or career. One entered life and did the things incidental to its preservation with more or less regularity. For a few tedious years, as determined by some big men in Buenos Aires, Tuco and his ilk were imprisoned for a portion of each day in a large room where they were lectured on all manner of subjects in words seldom more comprehensible than those spoken by the priest at Mass. After this, one took to living – living full-time – which occasionally required an expenditure of sweat and pain. The priest had explained that this was a kind of tax upon sins which had been gathering interest on Man for a while (though some folks seemed remarkably unconcerned about paying this tax). Some laid bricks and some dug ditches; some carried heavy loads in the manner of donkeys, but by far the most toiled in the care and processing of crops grown on the properties of men – other men; men not like them; men who had much land. Most of all, it was in the maté plantations where the eons-old exchange of sweat for bread took place. Tuco was tough and uncomplaining. He did every task well, so that whereas the other lads were allowed to sweat and earn bread for a few months out of the year, between which intervals they drank themselves to sickness and spent themselves to beggary, Tuco remained where he was, month after month, year after year.

            The estanciero, on horseback in white suit and broad-brimmed hat, watching the shirtless, shoeless men growing wealth, saw this and was pleased. Tuco soon began to receive more silver and copper each month than the men who worked beside him and, because he did not use it to buy liquor or women, he worked strong and steady when drink and sickness made those beside him grow weak-limbed and slow…which added more coffee cans full of silver to the mine under the floorboards of his room.

            At rest breaks or relaxing after work, Tuco’s colleagues – mostly young men like himself, Indians and Mestizos, plus a smattering of the European migrants who had fallen through the cracks or reprised their old-country roles – shared a few topics of conversation, adjusted and reframed but never varying in their basic substance. Prominent among these was each man’s hypothesizing what he would do with his pay; a mental analgesic for the physical sufferings of their toil. This man would save up and buy a donkey and a cart, hiring himself to transport crops, wares or fuel. Another would accumulate the capital to buy a stock of goods and rent a small shop to sell them from. And this other would hoard away cash till he could purchase a plot of land to farm on his own account, with no estancia, no padrone looking over his shoulder from his high horse. Not maté if course, nor sugar.  Perhaps tobacco or vegetables for the market; maybe a few dairy cows, a flock of chickens…No man bandied about grand visions and gilded stratagems for becoming a big proprietor or figure of renown himself. Anyone who boasted he would have a hundred hectares of land or someday own a substantial enterprise and have doctors and lawyers for sons would have been scorned as a daydreamer; as one who was paradoxically both a fool for desiring the unfeasible and a snob for outshining their own humble goals (if only in the battleground of the imagination). He must be ambitious, therefore mad. The men whose likenesses stood in greening bronze in the town square and whose names lay graven in the gateposts of lichened manors had been mad, too, of course.

            Tuco listened to these lectures as if they were fresh each day, nodding and smiling as appropriate, leaving unremarked (because he never seriously pondered it) the fact that the donkey prices, the shop capital, and the children’s educations became cachaça and dice, dead cocks and slow horses. Each month born anew, the same transformation occurred as if by an immutable law of the universe. Tuco listened, but he never commented on such tales. He remained taciturn because he did not have any of his own to share. Although he worked harder and wasted his wages less than his comrades, he had not given a moment’s thought to what he would do with the accretion; not even the most superficial speculation. His stoic heart harboured neither bitterness nor aspiration.

            As an earthquake jolting the volcano from its millennial slumber, a chancing glance of a pair of feather-lashed black eyes set his dormant heart boiling, steaming up a pressure which no force of reason or circumstance could cool or divert. There was not a week where Tuco did not attend the market, if for nothing but boredom, and there were plenty of fine distractions parading about and haggling at the stalls. The estate, however, was the real hub of the local economy, where almost everyone, man and woman, boy and girl, who was not a thoroughgoing merchant or burgher served their turn when larders ran low, dresses for quinceañeras and weddings needed purchasing, or when the paterfamilias (if he was not already on the estate) took ill or died. In every seasonal shift and harvest gang, there were always a few comely maids; an ample bosom, a sturdily shapely waist…what would spur the transient lusts of a red-blooded workman or overseer, usually traded at modest price without much expense or shame, but one never saw a truly beautiful woman; one who would not look out of place on a painter’s canvas (unless he were that type of painter who likes to depict, as ethnographic records or declarations of avant garde tastes, figures overbearingly rustic). No beauty who would be described by that adjective without qualification. Hunger as he might in his heart and work-exhausted daze, even an untraveled man like Tuco understood the deficiencies of the plebeian beauty which, while it might surpass others in moments of fatigue, darkness and rum, but which a gentleman would feel no little shame for having drunk of when daylight comes…sultry and alluring though she might be in the simple, bust-enhancing garb of a free-spirited barmaid or washerwoman, even her most sodden paramour well knew she’d ill fit the balls and soirees of the planters and rubber barons, turning squat and ungainly in dresses not drawn for her figure, clomping flat-footed in heels, a crude satire of a ‘Lady’… beauty that blooms frank and vigorous, just long enough to secure – or give the sense of securing – a modest, stolid provider, before being rapidly effaced by a life of unremitting toil. The human face and form, so said the Sage of Turin, expresses the spirit within, and in a rude and practical land will flourish rude and practical faces, hands and feet. But this, oh, this fair maid he espied…bearing a basket of plucked maté leaves cushioned upon silky tresses so black they shone blue in the late-noon sun…this was a different kind of Beauty.

            Tuco knew nothing of the myths of Greece and Rome to bestow upon her, in his mind, one of the analogistic appellations the poets favour to write up a woman’s character in three or four syllables. Nonetheless, he knew that the lithesome statue turning a glance so innocently bewitching, not five paces in front of him under the eaves of the drying-house shed, was of a different order. One sight of her rendered most of the rest of her sex crass and cheap – mere females – in comparison. There was something in this belle – who differed in no aspect of blood or clothing or colour from any other lass who laboured upon the estate – something that he could not have explained in concrete terms…something that embodied the same essential nature one perceived, instinctively, in the estate house’s Iberian colonial elegance, at once opulent and timelessly at one with the soil that bore it; in the hummingbird that feeds upon flowers, as if its beauty is nourished from theirs, floating rather than flying as ordinary birds do; or in the music that wafted on special nights out across the fields from the balconies of the great houses, sprinkling the dregs of rhythmless dreamsounds on the palm-roofed huts of the workers’ settlement.

            It unsettled him when he comprehended the sensation stirred up by the sinuous motions of her tawny arms, the nimble padding of her dust-kissed feet, unshod yet dainty and smooth, and, above all, those eyes which struck the onlooker like obsidian-tipped arrows. The sensation was like that – indescribable and of more than material origins – which was produced by the strange music which he would never admit a fondness for to his friends and drinking partners, but which drew him, unfailingly, to the doorway of his barracks room, no matter how tired his body. He could not reconcile it; for the one was a sound, never simultaneously associated with any unique sight, and the other was a visual phenomenon, very real, of course, but profoundly detached from any noise, smell or other merely concrete sensory impression. Moreover, that strange music which pulled at his soul in ways he did not understand was, he knew, a thing of the aristocratic folks – his bosses and their kin – made in and imported from across the sea in Europe; something which belonged to the rich blancos and their world, and which he had no wish to possess as his own. Tuco, after all, was not a man who coveted things which belonged to others, even when he could easily take them for himself. The angelic being in front of him was an India, with the same copper skin, black hair, almond-shaped eyes, proud cheekbones and firm but quiet jaw as he. She had been born to people like his, nourished on maize and beans, dwelling under palm-thatch roves like he – though judging by her nude soles and the many patches on her once-fashionable clothes, her household circumstances were somewhat below his own frugal but secure level. All these thoughts and a hundred more sprouting therefrom invaded and seized control of Tuco…and he did not even know her name, nor had he heard her speak a single word.

            Tuco had to hurry back to the fields and did not see the woman again that day. It was payday, and he took some of his earnings – in a move quite out of character – and splurged on as scanty a meal he could design from the menu without looking out of place, at a restaurant run by Germans which was frequented by the foremen, lower managers and the skilled workmen when they had the cash and fancied themselves able to sit alongside their social betters. The exotic black-beam-in-white-plaster architecture came with equally exotic dishes: huge joints of pork stewed without spices and cutlets coated in batter, served on mounds of vinegar-soaked cabbage, with bottles of nauseatingly sweet wine. But someone who worked in those other departments of the estate, so near but so foreign to Tuco, would surely have some threads of a story at least; some information regarding this girl who was the most beautiful to have set foot on the estancia (and that included the proprietor’s three daughters, seen regularly in carriages and at fetes in town…alas, though sheltered from sun and work, and adorned with fine silks and jewels though they were, no effort of presentation can compensate for unfortunately ordinary natural endowments)…this girl who was not only fine to look at, but something of a mystery and hence doubly alluring.

            As Tuco hoped, Rosario, the bookkeeper, and Herr Dreyse, the junior superintendent of the packing warehouse, whose granite-chinned frauline was supervisor of the girls at the sorting tables (which presumably included the object of Tuco’s desire), gave him fodder for a week of sleepless nights and wandering daydreams. Tuco found himself growing tipsy as he bought glass after glass of wine, for he had to wait through anecdotes about the latest sensational crimes, the minor celebrations around the return of Senor Narvaez’ son from his studies in Spain, and the ups and downs of agricultural commodity prices. His concentration never wavered, though, and each half-whispered factum entered his brain as a fish into a weir.

            There was a good reason why Tuco had not seen the mystery maid before, either working on the estate or at market. The girl – whose name was Ximena, Ximena de Aguirre – was of a family as poor as the one Tuco was born into, whose distinguished name was its sole attribute of note. Her father, who none but the older managers recalled (and those only as hazy impressions) had died in a barroom knife-fight when Ximena was yet an infant. The wife of the lawyer who employed Ximena’s mother as a domestic developed a fear – which none of the tellers could say was unfounded – that the recently-widowed servant harboured designs upon her prosperous husband (inevitably futile, but offensive to household peace nonetheless), and so dismissed her. Too proud to endure her peers witnessing her degraded to broiling in the fields or slaving in the packing house (no other cash employment being conceivable for an illiterate Guarani woman in such parts), and with the last few yards of her family patrimony sold off to pay her husband’s debts, Ximena’s mother took the child with her to Buenos Aires, that they might make a new life in ‘the Paris of the Americas.’ Ximena would have been about three or four then. Mother and daughter never returned to visit. Their relatives, receiving no wires of money nor parcels of presents from the city, made no effort to remain in contact (in their defence, it would have been a challenge, as there were no proper roads nor a complete telegraph or telephone system in those days).

            Herr Dreyse’s wife had become fast friends with the girl’s mother (both mother and daughter did indeed work in the packing house, though that was tentative). The veneer of metropolitan polish on the once-ambitious India, acquired in the City of Fair Winds, was sufficient for the Munich-raised Frau Dreyse, who had some education in her homeland and found herself in a backwards corner of a wild and alien land, with the added impediment of being resented by the working women (whose language she hardly spoke) and gently kept at arms’ length by the Ladies with a capital ‘L’ who were wives or sisters of the more prestigious members of the European staff. Indeed, Senora de Aguirre had been to the Dreyse household twice already for coffee and dinner. Fond the Senora was of regaling her provincial audience with dramatic and colourful anecdotes about life in the capital (Frau Dreyse hung on to every word about the utopia to the south, more accessible than the one she left across the Atlantic). As long and seemingly rambling as the Senora de Aguirre’s stores were, curiously – now that Herr Dreyse thought about it – not from any chapter or snippet of the cumulative hours of women’s chatter he’d been forced by politeness to overhear could he say or even reliably conjecture what exactly it was that mother and daughter de Aguirre did in B.A….that is, for her employment…or, for that matter, how they lived and why it was they left to return to what was plainly a harder life, devoid of the comforts and conveniences of civilization that tempted the youth of the countryside as a candle tempts restless moths. The local grapevine, intricate as it was, did not sprawl far beyond the red soil floodplain and its maté plantations, but for feeble tendrils here and there. Whatever the reason, the Estancia Narvaez and the small town symbiotic with it witnessed a sight rarer than a modern-day vision of the Virgin: an eager rural youth gone to the Big City to seek her fortune and fame (or some vague idea generally related thereto), returned, sound in mind and body, to her native soil…albeit no longer a youth and more sullen than eager.

            Naturally, such a rare spectacle incited gossip, most of it salacious or defamatory to a greater or lesser degree – though the various popular theories, however accurate they might have been, lacked substantive proof and in no way jeopardized the Senora and Senorita de Aguirre’s position at the estate or at the shabby-but-semi-respectable boarding house of Madame Schneider at edge of town, where mother and daughter shared a suite. Public opinion was not yet settled on where to place the pair. Undoubtedly, they were possessed of neither wealth nor honour, and, without any effective extended family, had no illustrious kinfolk to attach themselves to for status. On the other hand, the mother’s haughtiness was backed with enough composure, half-cooked worldliness and sheer feminine venom to be treated with some distant deference in public (whatever people said when out of range of her baleful glare), and the daughter – were it not for her ethnic features – was as polished and refined as any of the middling sort of eligible bride coming off the boats from Naples, Danzig or Cadiz.

            Throughout his lecture, Herr Dreyse cocked eyebrows and suggestively altered his inflection, although all-in-all nobody could have gleaned very much from what, beyond the bare-bone facts, was really nothing more than a little fodder for idle talk. At intervals, Dreyse had seen fit to drop odd mentions of the notable charms of the younger de Aguirre. It might have been perfectly unintentional, but Tuco couldn’t help but detect in it a sort of hinting, boisterously encouraging or disheartening according to his turn of mind at the moment.

            From that day, Tuco was like a catfish ogling a duck upon the water, entranced by whatever fatal mysteries might lurk within his prize. He daydreamed, something he had not done since he was a boy, but his work did not suffer. On the contrary, he went about his tasks with redoubled energy, especially when his gang was set in any place where the mostly female-staffed packing house workers and domestics might pass by – for he could not be sure, on account of her looks and city-smoothed charms, that Ximena would not be switched to some activity in the big house (while he fretted for the health and tender hands of her, so vivacious yet wincingly delicate, scrambling in the dry leaves, sewing bags and tacking boxes, he shuddered with foreboding at the obvious alternative). Once, he had been sent from the field to visit the bookkeeper’s office – only a few dozen yards from the house – so that he might request the urgent dispatch of some extra horses to replace an exhausted team.

            Dragging out his steps as he came in view of the house, Tuco was certain he caught sight of Ximena’s face – he convinced himself there was no more chance of mistaking it among the sallow visages of the Casa than among the coarse mugs of the labourers – and she appeared to notice him, for her eyes expanded like ink drops on tissue and her image vanished as suddenly as he had noticed it. He hung around the bookkeeper’s office for as long as he could, feigning uncertainty as to the message he was tasked with delivering, and making small talk with the clerk on duty who, while on good terms with Tuco, felt compelled to offer a drink and a call to the doctor. Tuco nursed the tumblerful of whiskey, paying attention enough to shake his sweat-beaded head whenever the clerk proffered a chair or medical attention, keeping his eyes glued to the stucco-framed windows of the house. After twenty minutes with no results, Tuco reluctantly headed back to the fields. He did not see Ximena again that day and finally gave in and stopped Dreyse as he was going home for the evening, asking if Ximena had been in the packing section that day. No, Dreyse replied with a too-placid expression; she and her mother had taken ill…nothing serious; it was the chill weather of late and overwork…and had stayed home from work.

            Tuco nodded. He scarfed a meagre supper at a tavern in the village and, uncharacteristically, took several drinks before returning to his room for sleep. The unspoken angst he felt lasted for a few days. He caught scattered glimpses of Ximena as she ducked in and out below the awnings of the packing warehouse or ate lunch with the other girls under the mimosa tree in the yard, but he never managed to find her alone. He told himself that he would surely have the courage to speak to her then. He had never lost his voice or his head in front of a woman before, although deep down he knew it might happen now.

            There was snickering among the field hands; the replacement of the female name in the lyrics of a bawdy tune with ‘Ximena.’ The bookkeeper’s clerk must have made insinuations. Or Dreyse. The other hands saw it as quite juicy that one of their own who was held (whether he himself knew it or not) as being more disciplined, stronger and harder working than the rest of them (as better, in other words, than they at the only thing they were capable of being in this life), was showing such disgraceful weakness. Most of them had several women, all of whom they might call ‘wife,’ though they would not so much as take one of them out for a fancy dinner, let alone house and provide for them (beyond a few gaudy prizes when harvest pay came in), even if they could. They boasted all the louder for the fact that the one means left them to demonstrate their manhood chronically debilitated them.

            It was the night of St. Lawrence’s day, Lawrence being the patron saint of the estate owner for some reason lost in time, on which the family would put on a feast for the village. The notable burghers and the families of neighbouring ranches and estates would dine on silver and fine china in the Casa Narvaez, accompanied by a band brought in from the city, if possible, playing facsimiles of popular European operas (though there had occasionally been Tango at the insistence of the padrone’s fashion-minded son, who the father indulged reluctantly). The workmen and their families dined outdoors, on the grounds, served by liveried staff from the estate, to the alternately sprightly and melancholy music of gaucho and Guarani. The food was plentiful and good; Senor Narvaez was a hard businessman and a harder ruler, but he was beloved as a rich and genial uncle on feast days, for the wine of his cellars – almost too decent for the throats imbibing it – flowed as blood from a gutted steer, running dry only when all livers present were well and truly saturated. Tuco staggered into an ornamental grove to relieve himself. Turning around he saw, silhouetted by the twin lights of the moon and the glowing party in the house, a figure he could have confused for no other. What few words passed between the might have been solely in his head. He did not think to ask how or from whom Ximena had learned of his intentions, nor what she thought about them. Whether she was more drunk than him, or simply wilful to the point of madness, was a question he declined to probe.

            Unlike his colleagues, Ximena knew how to keep her mouth shut. There was none of the expected whispers and tittering when he ran across Ximena’s coworkers…a fact almost beyond belief. It was no ‘fling’ or ‘escapade,’ not this time. Other than that first night, she talked a lot when they were together, so many stories, that must have been dull and familiar to her but which sounded like fairy tales to him – mind, like the originals which Perrault and the Grimms softened, they were not necessarily quaint or happy in their endings. Ximena rarely spoke about her own thoughts and feelings regarding any specific person or matter, but it was clear even to Tuco’s blatantly unworldly mind that Ximena herself was a character in many of these dramas, albeit an unmentioned one. He was quite sure, too, that she knew and wanted that he should realize this. It made him fear for her and want to protect her. Sometimes, when he was swinging his billhook at work, he would imagine himself warding off the now-purely-physical tormentors of Ximena, and would suddenly lose his balance as he hacked with absurd force at a superfluous twig or shoot

            Almost as suddenly as things had begun, Tuco came to understand that he now must move to the next stage. After several trysts of pure, amorous passion, Ximena began to show reticence; to pull away and make excuses. Ximena began to speak, with watered eyes, of propriety and her latest confessions at church. Tuco understood what this meant. He had been saving as much as possible at every paycheque, for he had known that, in the natural course of things, it must come to this mixed boon and burden. After all, Ximena was no cheap tavern whore; no simple Indio girl who might be savoured for the price of a new print dress or bangle every couple weeks. No; Ximena de Aguirre was a Lady who had to be courted as such.

            It was a week before he could even pretend to himself the courage to visit the elder Senora de Aguirre at her lodgings in town. The studied reclusiveness of the woman and the foreign graces of her daughter outweighed what comfort he might have drawn from the peeling shutters and creaking floorboards long since stripped of varnish by the footfalls of thousands of continually shifting tenants. The taciturn, crab-faced lady at the front desk led him up the shadowed, lightless stairs to the third floor apartment occupied by his love and her mother.

            Senora de Aguirre stayed half-hidden in the chiaroscuro effected by the single oil lamp on the oval, doily-draped table and the closed, age-yellowed silk curtains. The hot, golden light threw jagged shadows across her face’s prominent bones, shading the deep-set eyes in total darkness. Tuco attempted perfunctory introductions in Spanish as proper as he could manage and placed his gifts upon the table. Modest gifts, but significant given his slender paycheque and, given the Aguirre’s circumstances, they ought to have been received gratefully – Tuco kept this thought to himself. The shadowed figure said a few canned pleasantries in return, thanking him in the most formal and insincere manner possible for his presents. No offer of coffee or tea was forthcoming…in light of the address and the Spartan, out-of-style furnishings of the room, Tuco couldn’t tell if it was the embarrassed modesty of poverty, or a sign of disapproval, and he took his leave gracefully (so he felt, anyways).

            That was a Saturday, and in the following week, Tuco saw Ximena a couple times, though she was busy with work (as was he), and if he jeopardized his job for an assignation, he would have killed his biggest attraction. Ximena did not press him. On the other hand, she was frustrating in her evasiveness when he tried to question her about her mother. A daughter who, though her natural charms would give her profligate freedom in independence (for so long as a dreamy young girl’s mind can foresee, at least), nonetheless chose to remain by her mother’s side, going so far as to migrate to a sultry backwater she barely had memory of – foregoing, in the process, even the faintest fantasy of being a dancer, singer, or motion picture starlet – such a daughter would not marry without her mother’s approval, no matter how much she loved him. Indeed, the very fact she did love a man would firm her resolve, for the greater her sacrifice of her own selfish desires, the more she could relish her filial piety, assuaging whatever guilt or insecurities lurked in her lonely child’s mind.

            Tuco tried to glean tidbits from his colleagues in the fields, but they knew no more than he. He grudgingly shovelled out precious cash at the German restaurant in the hope that Dreyse or some of the diners would have some news…the regulars at Frau Schneider’s table being more in the class of people who Senora de Aguirre would want to associate herself with (though her sights were probably higher and her means lower) than common workmen, maids and market vendors. Dreyse appeared sympathetic and defrayed the cost of Tuco’s drinks, but he reluctantly conferred that he had nothing to offer, either, for the elder de Aguirre had ceased to work in the packing house, while his wife’s supervisory duties had kept her from paying calls on her friend. As for the younger de Aguirre, she was working, yes, but frequently left early, what with her mother being ill and the hiring of a nurse being out of the question.

            This puzzled Tuco. He was sure Ximena would have told him if her mother’s condition was so bad. He would have gladly offered – and secretly hoped he would be given the chance – to chip in to pay for a nurse or housekeeper, at least in the daytime, so that Ximena could work her full shift with her mind at ease. All labour was cheap in the province, but the labour of a girl or woman paid to do the things that all women knew was much cheaper than the labour of a strong young man, experienced in various kinds of specialized farm and mechanical work. And with his and Ximena’s incomes together – and everyone who knew the packing warehouse commented on what a diligent worker she was – they would survive just fine…a simple life, yes, but free from want in any of the real necessities of life. In this country, with land vast and boundless beyond the capacity of the hands tending it, a sober man with strong arms who neither gambled nor whored would never find himself without bread for his stomach and a roof over his head, despite it being the middle of a Depression.

            Thus Tuco reasoned with himself as he strolled down the street leading from the German restaurant through the market square and on down to the estate workers’ residences. The theories and plans he had constructed evaporated like rainwater on paving stones when the sun breaks through the clouds. He saw Ximena. She was going about her shopping, judging by the bags and baskets of different sorts of goods loading down her arms and shoulders. Her face, her hair, her smooth copper skin were as always, but there was guilt and shame in those obsidian eyes…feelings like he’d never seen before nor assumed her capable of. Her broad, rouged lips hung open wordless, but words would have been superfluous. It was natural, Tuco accepted, that Ximena should do the shopping for her small household, seeing as her mother was infirm and probably embarrassed by the mocking sidelong glances and over-loud whispers of the market women delighting in her newfound equality with them. It was not natural, though, that Ximena’s bag and baskets should be filled so inordinately full with fresh apples and pears, imported whitefish in tins, assorted Dutch and French cheeses, jellies and jams, crisp baguettes and other delicacies. It was natural that the nimble-fingered, keen-eyed girl should sew and mend clothing, maybe doing seamstress work in her off hours. It was manifestly out of place that she should bear under her arms not bolts of thin cotton prints, but rolls of salt-white linens, polychrome sateen and airy taffeta – such as the buttercream ensemble cascading in lacy ruffles to her ankles. Her padding, tender soles he glimpsed not, even as she curled and rolled her feet beneath her as if to hide them under her skirt – his gaze was denied by point-toed patent leather heels, decorated by useless silver buckles and so shiny he could see his defeat reflected within them. He did not ask her any questions or even look deeply into those bewitching eyes. He knew he would find only more lies.

            Dreyse, Dreyse’s wife, the overseer’s clerk…all must have known. However, much as Tuco wanted to reproach them, they couldn’t have known for very long. The young squire, Senor Narvaes, fils, as the only son of a wealthy family, had always been of a wilful, capricious nature; something Narvaez, père, had hoped a proper education in Europe might cure. Perhaps he might find a wife among some titled family in Spain, someone who would bring a restorative to the old gentry lines so long intermixing with each other – the Casa Narvaez had no need for that which money alone could buy. A few years earlier, and with a few more offspring in the line of succession, the son’s eccentricities would have received stern rebuke from the tradition-minded old man; if it wouldn’t harm his health, it was still bad form that a gentleman should prefer arepas and frijoles to beef and bread. Time and distance allow for reflection, however, and as Papa Narvaez read in the belated newspapers about the situation in the old country and searched his son’s infrequent letters for clues that he might be infected (like the rest of the university students and young dilettantes in Madrid) with the germs of godless, anarchic communism, his heart’s capacity for tolerance expanded several-fold. Love at first sight may not be the wisest policy, but no one has yet succeeded in refuting it with logic. Besides, as his wife nudged him, the sooner he got married, the less chance there was he would take off in a fit of idle heroism, like the Posada’s third boy, who had turned his mother’s hair white and sent her to the Confessional every week after he sailed to join the Republicans, shuttering churches and teaching some undoubtedly sinful thing called ‘interpretive dance’ to Andalusian peasants. And it was not the case that any of their forebears, the brave cavaliers who conquered the Andes and submitted the Pampas to the plough had taken Indian women as wives. Was not there a drop of Guarani or Mapuche blood in the noblest and most venerable families in the country – in them more than in the new arrivals? What did it matter if she were three fourths Indian, or even four fourths? Somehow her poor mother (there would be some headaches, admittedly) had managed to infuse her with all the charms and elegance of a true lady, who, once she stayed out of the sun and put on some proper clothes, would not look out of place in their grade of Society.

            Tuco had quietly left the estate as soon as he could. Fate had not been without sympathy for Tuco, and soon provided him with an opportunity to avenge his failing as a man, to forget Ximena’s treachery, or, if he could not forget, to win her back when the slick-haired fop flung her aside, as Tuco knew he would, leaving her to run to the arms of a true man, one who had proven himself as men from the dawn of history and before have done. He had not been in Paraguay six weeks before it happened that war broke out with Bolivia. He felt at home in the country he’d never visited, more at home than on the estate for, while the plantation and village Narvaez were familiar, he was cursed to ever remain a half-stranger, whereas on the farm he’d tramped out to near Encarnación, almost everyone was his own people; the people of his mother and father, who bore their features, ate their food and sung their songs in unconscious defiance of the conquerors’ will.

            Tuco cared not how it began. That some professors from America and England claimed to have found oil in the Chaco was not irrelevant to him – there would be good jobs when the fighting was through and the Bolivians driven out, especially for men like him, who had rare mechanical skills. Jobs that would pay better than working the soil – Ximena would need him to be solid and strong in every way a man could be when the cad came to scorn her. He did not hate the ‘Bolitas’; he had seen, after the first battle, that, officers aside, they were men like him. Sometimes the enemy was well-armed, with Krupp cannons and Madsen guns. In one battle, his regiment had been scattered with the Bolivians sent in great, tortoise-like vehicles running on tracks like steam excavators, whose hide was impervious to rifle and pistol bullets as the mapinguari’s. On other occasions, he and his comrades had charged enemy trenches, shocked at the lightness of their casualties, till the position had been stormed and they discovered that the enemy soldiers had only a fistful of cartridges to their state-of-the-art German-made rifles. Some of the smaller-built among the dead ‘men’ on the other side wore bushy, unkempt beards – a yank and a tug revealed tender, smooth faces that had yet to sprout a whisker of their own.

            The fighting that interspersed the stultifying boredom was rough, to be sure; the tribal vengeances that two generations prior would have been carried out with fragile bows and leathern bolos, now enacted with machine guns, grenades and armed biplanes. Had not most of them wallowed in the same barbarity a decade and some prior, the foreign observe-advisors and journalists would have chalked it up to the influence of savage heredity which had not yet time to adjust its techniques to modern tools which multiplied man’s destruction capacity a thousand-fold. By the spring, the headlines in the world’s presses were already alluding to a ‘meat grinder’ and ‘the nightmare of the trenches’ in the same breath and would soon have occasion to speak of a ‘South American Verdun’ or a ‘South American Passchendaele.’ The abysmal poverty of the two landlocked nations party to the conflict became the greatest hope for mercy, as neither could afford the bullets and shells to keep up the killing for very long, and the bankrupt states of Europe had not the cash to waste on an amusing but distant cockfight.

            General Estigarribia, commander in chief of the Paraguayan forces, knew this and so had his First Division on a forced march up the Arce-Saavedre-Alihuatá road, deep into the belly of the Chaco Humedo, so that if a ceasefire came, there would be a goodly spread of flags and markers on the sandbox map – Chile, Argentina, and the big foreign companies in Buenos Aires and Valparaiso were waiting like vultures to pounce on the victor with contracts and investments. The wily general knew, also, that the Edenic voluptuousness of the country was deceptive: the verdure covering the ground as modestly as a bridal veil hid a thin red soil that would collapse under the demands of a flock of goats, not to speak of an army of men. Not that he would have been averse to ‘foraging’ off the civilian population like a Napoleon or a Sherman; it was not so clever a strategy where the civilians were few and what passed for farms were a few hillside gardens stabbed into the charred soil with a digging stick. The aggressive strategy was a sensible way to capture some map-named points, but it was inevitable that the enemy would notice the glaring flaw in it that kept the general awake at night.

            Never having seen a map of Paraguay, Tuco did not know what it meant when panicked word spread along the line that the fort at Alihuatá had fallen, except that the great serpent of men and trucks turned round and marched double-quick, and that the number of biscuits and bully beef tins handed out each day grew smaller and the water trucks no longer filled their canteens quite full. On their retreat, hamlets where they’d bivouacked were charred and empty, the men in ditches, the women in the forests or on their way to hunger and the brothel in some large town No panpipes or melancholy songs perforated the leaden, humid night air; only the snarling of carrion-fed pie dogs and the screeches of predatory nightbirds.

            After setting camp for the night in the bed of a dry ravine (so their fires would not show to the artillery arrayed across the plain), Tuco was called, drowsy with sleep and the extra rations of a fever-felled comrade, into the Colonel’s tent. He was to be promoted to sergeant, in command of fifteen men, for an assault the next day, where he would be in the first wave. The ribbons pinned to his shirt shone to him only because he imagined they would shine for the eyes of another. The enemy was here? Tuco could not help asking. No, his superior replied; but they would be coming, advancing across the plain – his subalterns learned this listening to the radio. Tuco wondered how men fighting war could be so foolish as to talk their plans on a radio. Mortal fear overrode the thin shell of discipline formed in a couple weeks’ training, though, and Tuco asked how they meant to fight the Bolivians in the open ground again, for his brother soldiers and the radio had told him of how the Bolivians massacred the Paraguayans at Alihuatá and Campo Jordán, largely through employing those metal cars with caterpillar tracks, into which they had put some of their machine guns. No bullet could pierce their hides, and if men tried to approach close enough to throw grenades at them, they would be cut down by the machine guns or the Bolivian infantrymen around them. Was it not safer to retreat to a town, where they could shelter behind walls of stone and adobe, and so give themselves a fair chance? He had seen how one third of the men of his regiment were no longer with them, and the Bolivians had so many more soldiers, no matter what they did; more men, perhaps, he fretted, than they had bullets. The Colonel rose up, laughing and smiling down at Tuco, clapping a hand on his shoulder as one is wont to do in explaining some fact to an earnest but naïve child. Tables had turned, or would be shortly, the Colonel said, fondling his moustache. They would have help now: Argentina, uncomfortable at seeing the fighting spilling out to its own borders (and eager for its share of the wealth of The Hunting Land) had decided to send money and weapons to their side, to help them fend off the Bolivians so numerous. They were sending men, too; volunteers – the 7th Cavalry Regiment San Martin – with many rich men among them, some of whom were bringing great big rifles that folks used in far off places to hunt huge beasts called elephants; rifles which could put a bullet clean through the Bolivians’ metal monsters. The next day, when the Bolivians came rolling across the plain, they would await them at the ravine’s edge, in ditches and behind trees and boulders, kill their armoured cars, stop the advance, and then sweep over them like a brush fire. The Colonel clapped his hands and gulped a glass of brandy in premature celebration.

            It sounded fanciful, but the fanciful does not trouble the minds of men who have long lived outside the grey City, where people have grown trusting of the rules and textbooks by which humanity assumes the authority to dictate the conduct of the universe. He fell into sleep as easily on the eve of the great battle as a babe in the crib. Upon waking, there was, nonetheless, a strange residue of an unremembered dream. He recalled no unsettling sights, and there could not have been any nocturnal visions of disaster as would have waked him in a cold sweat. Still, he did not like that the feeling persisted through coffee and breakfast, no matter that the dawn arrived, revealing the landscape as obtusely bright and physical as he’d known it those past few months. And yet the curious sense of an impending something weighed on his nerves and made his fingers shake in lacing his boots and fumble twice as he loaded his rifle.

            The battle opened; it was as if the sky were covered by a sheet of invisible zinc drumming with a monsoon rain. But for the noise in the sky and the rumbling that came up through his feet and knees into his throat, the world was images and smells; ears were a superfluous annoyance. Events unfolded precisely as the Colonel had laid out. Onward came the men and boys of the enemy, the terror they must have felt being calmed by the olive-painted beasts crawling forward among them.

            The ivory trunks of the yatay palms, ramrod straight and arranged checkerboard fashion, flickered light and dark as the advancing army crossed in front of them. A minute more, and the Vickers tankettes emerged into open ground and Tuco lost count of the khaki-clad infantry swarming beside and behind them. Looking down his own side’s trenches from where he hunkered in a shallow gut, Tuco observed the allies the Colonel had spoken of with such enthusiasm – the Argentine volunteers of the 7th Regiment San Martin, disappointingly unmounted, waiting behind hastily constructed mud and log parapets on the right flank. It was easy to recognize them, even at a distance, by their crisp uniforms tailored like gentlemen’s suits, flared trousers and pale complexions. The second Tuco looked back at the advancing Bolivians, the volunteers’ anti-tank rifles boomed like a summer thunderstorm echoing across the plain, and the rifles and machine guns rattled and burped into action. Most of the tankettes stopped in their tracks, as if on order. Ten or fifteen seconds later, smoke and fire licked out from their hatches and seams, the crew occasionally following, before the vehicles flared up like piles of dry tinder.

            Despite the focusing influence of battle, Tuco found his attention inadvertently wandering over to his allies on the right, rather than the foe ahead of him. It was the sensation when one is in a crowd, or a place rich in nostalgia, when one instinctively expects to run into an old friend.

            From an unseen dugout down the line came a cascading relay of whistle blasts. Tuco checked his rifle, slapped his waist to feel the grenades hooked to his belt, and shouted cheers to his squad. Up over the embankment they charged, hunching low and ploughing headlong through the chest-high grass and thorn-scrub. He was blind until he burst into the clearing beneath the towering palms. A quarter of his squad did not come out of the grass, but the enemy had suffered worse. Lines of blue shadow and golden rays painted heaps of still and quivering bodies, mown like so much hay by the accurate rifle fire of the volunteers. A few tankettes were smouldering; the survivors running headlong to positions along a farther line of forest, situated at the base of a small mesa a couple hundred yards away, from which an emplaced skirmish line was taking potshots to cover their comrades’ retreat.

             Passing noon, the sun compelled Tuco and his men to drain their canteens. The narrow-crowned yatays provided almost no shade, though their fat, hard trunks and the bushes around them would do against the Bolivians’ bullets. Tuco looked with disgust to see the Argentines from their right flank just now slowly marching up, taking positions well back of the edge of the yatay grove. A runner was arriving from the rear, though Tuco guessed his message before he arrived and breathlessly poured out the report that the Bolivians were dug in in the next wood (so said the aircraft observers…though what could they know of the strength of an infantry position from in the sky?), which rose up in that direction. It was open ground in front; the Colonel did not want a frontal assault. There was a stream, though, in a shallow gully which curved around the left of the Bolivian position (Tuco could tell this from the vegetation; no need for an aeroplane). Tuco’s squad would go with Lieutenant Haber’s company through the ravine, outflank the Bolivians, and turn them to flight before they could bring up artillery or mortars. The Argentine marksmen on the right would give covering fire in order to pin the Bolivians and draw their fire while the maneuver was under way, of course.

            The straw-blonde blades of the elephantine grass drew invisible lines across Tuco’s shins and calves…The stream ran beside and around behind the Bolivian positions. Tuco, half-dead from heat, thirst, and sheer muscular exhaustion by the time they reached, could not believe that the enemy had not noticed eighty men staggering like heavily laden zombies to within a grenade’s throw. But, there they were, each bolita lying or crouching in the cool purple shade of the wood, calmly plugging away at the Argentineans across the field in front of them; not doing much damage, perhaps, but utterly safe themselves. Until Tuco’s men avalanched upon them at point blank range, that is. It was an affair of bayonets, grenades, daggers, shovels, fingers and teeth…not the sort of war which would appear on an Art Deco recruitment poster…

            Bolivian positions, further into the wood, held out, the odd sniper claiming an unlucky fellow who stood too long in the open, but the bulk of them were once more streaming back, split by the mesa. The full heat of the afternoon had burnt out whatever fight was left in either side. Tuco, his part played, the adrenaline spent, flopped into a half-finished foxhole at the base of a spreading acacia tree, accompanied by the corpses of a pair of Bolivian machine gunners. Resting his back on the parapet, he stared out from the forest’s twilit noon at the grassland which broke again at the edge of the forest island, through which the defeated Bolivians were scurrying. The prairie, dotted by the odd clump of thorny acacias and ragged quebrachos, stretched into an infinite horizon. The distant sky had grown dark, a blend of chalky ultramarine and purple, presaging rain, yet the sun struck the mesa with an uncanny brightness. He could hear the not-quite-extinguished battle popping ad cracking, but the whizz of bullets into the dirt a few metres away could not convince his mind of its relevance. His attention was concentrated exclusively on the mesa. It glowed radiantly, a curious deep, matte maroon colour which Tuco was sure could not be the natural hue of the stone.

            He opened his eyes. He was on his side, in the bottom of the shallow foxhole, facing into the dirt. Reflexively touching his head, though he felt no pain, he wondered how long he had been sleeping. He got up on his knees, peering over the parapet. The scene looked unchanged; the carnage exactly as he’d left it. A few of his platoon were visible here and there, quenching their thirsts behind cover or trading shots with the Bolivians lingering in the far corners of the wood. The Argentine volunteers, along with some Paraguayan troops carrying disassembled mortars and machine guns, were still crossing the open ground on the other side, between the wood Tuco’s men had just captured and their original positions. He was not surprised at all by what he saw among the ranks of friendlies, gingerly picking their way over the seized ground – though this very lack of surprise almost scared him at first. There, pointing directions to a mortar team as they advanced was a face familiar, even though Tuco had never seen it except before it had meaning to him. The glossy, knee-high boots, polished by some Indio boy orderly that morning and no doubt to be polished again when the sun fell; the gold braid on the weighty cuffs and on the stiff peaked cap, the glint of the mother-of-pearl grip of the pistol in the belt holster, and, above all, that face – refined, sensitive yet arrogant; the firm but delicate jaw and thoughtful eyes emanating the gentle fatalism of one who has succeeded by the mere fact of being his self. Tuco contemplated this discovery and wondered what to make of it. Then he looked at the hand gesturing to the mortar crew, fingers soft and uncalloused…as he studied this hand as best he could from the distance, the sun flamed upon something on it the way it flamed upon the queer mesa silently watching the scene, and Tuco knew what he must do…knew what he would do. The breech of his rifle opened; a stack of brazen bullets slotted in, sparkling as they vanished into the black belly of the Mauser. The Bolivian troops used the same rifles, firing the exact same ammunition as the Paraguayans. Solid, accurate guns, German-engineered. Precise far beyond the abilities of the chuño-fed conscripts who used them. At not even one hundred metres, on a steadily advancing target, a spot of red on the clean, pressed light-grey fabric told he could not have missed…

            Ordinarily, it bothered Tuco to see officers – rich men and the sons of rich men – being decorated with ribbons and medallions symbolizing the bravery belonging to the silent peons and barrio youths rounded up and traded for glory. He knew little of the dogmas preached by the trade unionists and professors, but he was conscious of his own manhood. He did not protest now, however. He stood, graven faced in the attentive ranks, as the General spoke into a microphone rigged up in front of the post office at the nameless settlement nearest the late battlefield. The General congratulated his boys (there were boys among them, but grizzled veterans, too) on their glorious victory, laying out strings of allusions and metaphors which produced no images in the soldiers’ minds. The General only regretted that it had come at the cost…numerically insignificant, but a sorrowful loss to the nation…of Lieutenant X, Major de Y…as well as one of the brave young souls whose sense of honour and love of freedom inspired them to come and fight as loyal friends of Mother Paraguay, Lieutenant Narvaez, 7th Cavalry Regiment San Martin….

            Tuco wore the sun-and-grime patina of the genuine grognard as naturally as he wore a campesino’s straw hat. Thus, his platoon mates came to the conclusion that he had been picked off by a Bolivian sniper during the night march through hostile territory. It was more credible than the truth, which no one would have bought besides the most cynical staff officer: that the indomitable Sergeant Tuco had deserted the ranks while much war remained to be fought.

            In a country corrupt and disorganized in the best of times (and now preoccupied with war), it was not hard for an unimportant man, no different in aspect from the average seasonal labourer, to move about unmolested by the forces of law and order. Crossing the border presented no obstacles, either, as Misiones was not formally incorporated into the Argentine state, and tropical backwaters run by Big Papa-Uncle types are not known for sophisticated bureaucracies and well-regulated customs controls. Spending freely to travel fast, Tuco was only a couple days behind the unfortunate Lieutenants personal effects (sending the body was impossible). Not wanting to create unnecessary difficulties, he lodged in a town several kilometres from the estate. Events of note in such parts are few enough that, posing as an itinerate labourer seeking hire on an estate, he could not avoid hearing, again and again, the news about the Casa Narvaez’ owner’s son having been killed on the battlefield. The other boarders at dinner, coarse working-class types like Tuco, agreed that the whole great war between Bolivia and Paraguay was a fool’s errand, the why and wherefore of which escaped them (mostly from want of reading), but it made the beans stick in his throat when Tuco saw the wistful glaze in rugged miners’ and cattlemens’ eyes when they reflected on how the old man’s only son, raised soft and spoiled how he was, nonetheless had so gleefully signed up to kill and die, meeting his end with his boots on, gun in hand, no shame to his conquistador forebears, real or imagined.

            The iron-grey sky was spilling an icy deluge, mudding the laterite roads and making each step an effort of will. Tuco was nonetheless grateful for the weather. It was an excuse to shroud himself in a long poncho as he made his way up the main street of the village he called home. None recognized him. It was as the returning soldier wished. He had on him a few days’ biscuits, dried beef, a Bible, a gold ring set with a diamond in the new-fangled fashion, and a Colt pistol from a dead Bolivian machine gunner’s holster.

            He detoured from the main road to cut through a maté field he’d worked planting. The field, whose bushes were high and full, stood on a slight elevation. It gave fine vantage of the immediate grounds of the estate – the great house, stables, garage and other outbuildings, and the ornamental gardens. The lilies sagged their waterlogged heads and the colours of the roses were dulled from the rain and cloud. The weather was matched in mood by the sombre military men in their grey cloaks who bowed to the assembled crowd and presented the arranged effects of the deceased Lieutenant Narvaez to his father. The old man’s face was white as his shirt, his suddenly aged frame drooping like his rain-soaked moustache. The old man’s trembling hands were usurped, though, by arms frail and feminine, belonging to one whose manifest grief was as profound as his own – but oppositely expressed. The woman’s ivory complexion was rendered more dramatic by the curtains of intricate black lace and silk that billowed around her frame, much reduced since Tuco had glimpsed her last, and her posture and motions would have convinced anyone she was a European lady – and an aristocrat at that – at least from a distance. There was no mistaking the face, though, and those brilliant almond-shaped eyes flashing a light which could not have come from the rain-muffled sun. She could not have seen him; he knew that, but he saw her clearly in those eyes, and in the wail, at once angelic and terrifying, which pierced the rain, and wind, and his soul.

           The funeral, such as it could be in the absence of a casket, proceeded with a satisfying combination of grief and decorum. The priest, who had known the departed when he was an altar boy, intoned the ritual phrases in correct and sublime Latin, the somber mood broken only once. Who would be so ignorant as to go hunting grouse or hare in such weather, and on such a day? But the mourners, in accord with the religious atmosphere of the occasion and with their minds on more important matters, were charitable enough to forgive the insensitivity of someone who was probably a sporting tourist come up from the city for the weekend; someone who could never know their hearts.

Cities of the Plain

Where the Don and Humber carved their way
Down to the Lake, through grey and iron clay
Shone Cities six, spires of ice in fleeting winter day.

Rich and teeming, provincial indulgence
Painting ikons in Boreal effulgence;
As the riptide unseen surging,
Shoreside eminence, so fast emerging,
That absence – four years’ span –
Made native son a stranger-man.
Where sprang one at eve came two at morrow
Out from tarry field and concrete furrow;
Ambition’s airy dust spread o’er seeds of sorrow.

Like moths in the firelight of LED dreams,
Trusting all is thrice what it seems,
The beacon spire,
Polychrome with flameless fire,
Drew them in from all aroun’;
From fishing port and fact’ry town;
From orchard groves in Niagara’s lee
And grave-dark woods, where voyageur and Cree
Stalked the prize beaver by the edge of an inland sea,
And beneath a chilling iv’ry moon
The Shield-rock echoes the mournful loon.

No amber yield of the prairie loam;
No silv’ry haul from th’Atlantic gloam
Shored the roots of that swordless Rome.
No gold, no silver its custom paid,
Electric notions their code of trade
Of which a virtue their suited prophets made;
Their wages – not but toil –
Feeding fruits born of no earthen soil.

Tho’ hearts a’weary and credit spent,
Higher yet, their steely piles upward went;
Higher yet, their seedy hutches’ rent.
Tho’ swarm-sick souls sought far exiles;
Tho’ the saccharine maple fled their planted aisles,
They scaled the skies and sealed the ground, rooves pressed close like floortop tiles.

In relict towns,
Faces limned with careworn frowns,
Old folk huffed and crowed
But stemmed not their children’s outward flow;
Hearth-fires paled to deathly white
Before the awesome, opiate light
That drunks the halls of sleepless night.

Bearing envy of courage and fame,
They changed each honoured, ancient name;
They toppled knights of marble and bishops in bronze
To spare the ‘feels’ of haughty pawns.
In Council void of counsel, in the brooding crescent hall,
They quaffed the wine of grapes of gall,
Bittermost at budget time, in the waning of the Fall.
The suburbs suffered; their war-chest grew,
And lines long faded again they drew,
Cleaving the city new from out the City true,
On minivan and lawn, heaped value-rated pains,
Yet sent forth not the promised subway trains,
For “tax-cattle be damned, give Us our cycling lanes!”

History’s voices could not implore;
Their spot was the spot of their children no more.
Could they foresee this lost generation –
Their sacred joy in cold privation,
Their perverse and crooked recreation?
In Future’s web blindly caught,
Elder wisdom proud forgot,
Yesterday came an unkenned nought.
No Cassandra wailing doom
Is needful when barely rents a room
A grand – four walls of glazeless gloom.

Worst of all, they forgot the time
When northbound rains beat doleful rhyme
And lake and river wreaked wrath sublime.
A sage of the sidewalk, left cruelly free,
Who’d seen the green grow grey as he,
‘Mid Dundas’ throng, where none could see,
Strode forth in garments patched and thin
And hoarse above the mumbling din
Decried the marks of sheepish sin.

They scoffed and went on walking by;
They heard not the thunder in the clouded sky,
For Relief Line trains were rumbling nigh.
The Lake breathed out an inky squall
Which draped in dusk each crystal wall
And made the rain like Judgement fall.
The creeks and ditches burst their sides;
Commuters trapped without their rides;
A car – a house – lakeward slides!
No reedmarsh lay to sponge the muddy pour;
The rivers dash straight through the Core;
No elmwood grove nor ashen bough stood left to grant succour…

A bleakly stretching marshland; a springing weed-choked weald:
What long-forgotten mysteries – what secrets – do they yield,
These stony husks that strew the sodden field?
How long beneath has it thus lain?
The traveller asks the way in vain
Who seeks the Cities of the Plain.

. . .

.

© M.G. Warenycia, 30 December, 2017